Minor Characters
Guidance counselor
Melinda’s guidance counselor means well, but is unable to find out why she is cutting classes and is unable to make friends. Yet another powerless and unhelpful adult, the guidance counselor only makes matters worse in attempting to talk to Melinda’s parents about her problems.
Principal Principal
Melinda considers Principal Principal so incompetent that she refuses to even learn his name. Frequently fooled and mocked by students, Principal Principal tries and fails to connect with Melinda and to understand what is wrong with her.
Hairwoman
Melinda names her English teacher
Hairwoman because she cannot see her face through her thick hair. Obsessed with
The Scarlet Letter and creative writing, Hairwoman continually tries to get her students excited and inspired about English, although she often comes across as clueless and incompetent.
Ms. Keen
One of the few adults whom Melinda does not dislike, Ms. Keen is her smart and interesting biology teacher. Melinda is especially interested in her units about plants and trees, because of her art project on the subject.
Mr. Stetman
Like Ms. Keen, Mr. Stetman, Melinda’s algebra teacher, is kind, hardworking, and genuinely excited about his subject. Melinda, however, puts no effort into understanding algebra, and frequently earns terrible grades in his class.
Ms. Connors
Melinda’s gym teacher, Ms. Connors is impressed by her skill in basketball and tennis, but disappointed that Melinda’s terrible grades will not allow her to join the basketball team.
Spanish teacher
Melinda’s Spanish teacher attempts to use immersion to teach her students Spanish, but fails; she is yet another adult who fails to communicate with the high schoolers around her.
Librarian
Kind and understanding, the Librarian gives Melinda a late pass after she cries in the library. Melinda ends up taking advantage of this, stealing an entire pad of late passes in order to cut class.
Heather’s mother
Another clueless adult, Heather’s mother is friendly but phony. She encourages Heather’s friendship with Melinda, and seems concerned that her daughter hasn’t made more friends.
Coach Disaster
Because the school’s football team is so awful, Melinda renames the football coach Coach Disaster.
Basketball Coach
Like Ms. Connors, Basketball Coach is impressed by Melinda’s ability to make baskets, but disappointed that she cannot join the girls’ team. They offer to let her help coach the boys’ team in exchange for an A in gym, and while she says yes, she never actually follows through.
Kyle Rodgers
Although Kyle Rodgers never appears in the novel, it was at his party that Andy Evans raped Melinda.
Jessica
A former member of the Plain Janes (Melinda’s old friend group), Jessica has since moved to Nevada.
Raven Cheerleader and Amber Cheerleader
Melinda makes fun of the cheerleaders at her school, especially two blonde seniors whom she names Raven Cheerleader and Amber Cheerleader. At the end of the book, however, she sees Amber Cheerleader saying goodbye to Mr. Freeman, and realizes that she may have misjudged her.
Basketball Pole
One of the players on Merryweather High’s basketball team. His real name is Brendan Keller.
Hana
An exchange student from Egypt; Rachel’s friend.
Todd Ryder
A sleazy yearbook photographer, Todd Ryder uses his position for popularity — only the cool kids who hang out with him get good pictures.
Brendan Keller
A player on the boys basketball team who Melinda agrees to teach to shoot free-throws after impressing her gym coaches with her skill. Melinda refers to Brendan, privately, by the name "Basketball Pole," and doesn't actually show up to coach him.