An Imaginary Life

by

David Malouf

Suffering and Personal Growth Theme Analysis

Themes and Colors
Suffering and Personal Growth Theme Icon
Language, Perception, and Nature Theme Icon
Frivolity vs. Practicality Theme Icon
Childhood, Fate, and Identity Theme Icon
LitCharts assigns a color and icon to each theme in An Imaginary Life, which you can use to track the themes throughout the work.
Suffering and Personal Growth Theme Icon

David Malouf’s An Imaginary Life gives a fictional account of the Roman poet Ovid—a historical figure notorious for being the Roman Empire’s most irreverent public personality—after he is exiled for his indecent poems. Though most of the details of the real-life Ovid’s exile are lost to history, Malouf imagines what may have become of the infamous, hedonistic poet in his last years. In Malouf’s story, Ovid is exiled to the tiny village of Tomis, a humble settlement beyond the reaches of Roman civilization beset by long, brutal winters and constant raids from other tribes. Ovid eventually settles into his new home, but his relationship with the Child, a feral boy he finds in the forest—and whom the villagers believe carries a demon—forces him into exile once again. Despite Ovid’s constant pains, his journey and hardships radically transform his character, demonstrating how difficult experiences can become the catalyst for personal growth.

Ovid initially hates his exile and the hard lifestyle it demands, demonstrating that challenging circumstances might not immediately appear as an opportunity for personal development. After Ovid’s poetry and philosophy rile Emperor Augustus, Augustus banishes Ovid from Roman territory and sends him to live in Tomis, far beyond the edges of Roman society. The emperor places Ovid under the care of the village headman, Ryzak. Ryzak lets Ovid live with him, though Ovid suspects Ryzak may someday kill him to conclude his punishment. Ovid finds Tomis desolate and primitive, and considers the villagers to be “barbarians.” He thinks the landscape is “empty” and barren, without life or human sophistication, and describes his first year as “terrible beyond description.” He does not understand the villagers’ language, which he thinks sounds “barbarous and guttural,” and so becomes socially isolated as well. Ovid’s only hope is that the Emperor will reverse his decision. Ovid writes letters to his attorney in Rome asking for mercy, indicating that his sole hope is that life will return to the way it once was. Nothing comes of these pleas. Ovid’s pain and bitterness thus initially demonstrate how a suffering person may be overcome by their hardships and not immediately see opportunity for growth.

However, over several years, Ovid’s difficult life in Tomis strengthens his character and helps him to appreciate other people and the land that they live in, demonstrating that hardship can develop and refine a person’s character. Although Ovid scorned military service and duty for all of his life in Rome, the constant threat of raiders against Tomis’s small population force Ovid to drill and practice fighting with the other men. His body and resolve grow stronger. He begins to almost enjoy the lifestyle, and thinks, “What a very different self has begun to emerge in me,” indicating that the physical hardships, though they bring some pain, also make Ovid more resilient over the course of several years. Although Ovid initially looks down on the villagers as “relatively savage,” after years of living together, he comes to regard Ryzak as “the closest friend I have ever had” and thinks it “strange that I have had to leave my own people to find him.” This is particularly significant since Ryzak embodies duty and discipline, values that Ovid once detested. Ovid’s new appreciation for Ryzak suggests that the hardship of living amid a different culture makes Ovid develop an ability to understand and appreciate all types of people—particularly those who challenge him to grow as an individual. Ovid even learns to appreciate the subtle beauty of nature. Though he once detested the barren landscape around Tomis, after several years he states, “I have even begun to find my eye delighted by the simple forms of this place, the narrower range of colors,” indicating that years of exile in a relatively barren environment have taught him to appreciate the subtlety of nature. Ovid’s deeper appreciation for work, for other people, and for subtle beauty all suggest that hardship can develop one’s personal character.

In Ovid’s reflections on his sufferings, he ultimately argues that hardships are the catalyst of personal transformation—opportunities that are essential for human growth and development, even though they bring pain with them.  When the villagers become convinced that the Child carries a demonic spirit, the threat of violence forces Ovid to take him and flee north into the wilderness, beyond human society. Although Ovid once again must leave his home—since that is what Tomis becomes for him—he does not mourn the loss, but looks forward to the opportunity for new growth and challenge. As they trudge away from the village together, Ovid reflects, “What else should our lives be but a continual series of beginnings, of settings out into the unknown, pushing off into the edges of consciousness into the mystery of what we have not yet become.” Rather than dread oncoming hardships, Ovid’s reflection suggests that one should lean into them, recognizing them as opportunities to further grow and develop one’s character. Ovid argues that such challenges and subsequent growth are the essence of life. Ovid is eventually forced to flee Tomis when the villagers’ superstition toward the Child manifests in violence. Although Ovid is an old man at this point, he asks, “What else is death but the refusal any longer to grow and suffer change?” Ovid’s peaceful disposition and acceptance of hardship toward his final years—which will inevitably end in death during this second exile, without home or shelter—suggests that a life without suffering, and thus growth, is not a life worth living any longer.

Ovid’s transition from a poet devoted to leisure and comfort to an old man leaning into pain and hardship marks a complete reversal of his core values, which reiterates how suffering can be a powerful catalyst for personal growth, rather than a meaningless hardship.

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Suffering and Personal Growth Quotes in An Imaginary Life

Below you will find the important quotes in An Imaginary Life related to the theme of Suffering and Personal Growth.
Chapter 1 Quotes

Must it all be like this from now on? Will I have to learn everything all over again like a child? Discovering the world as a small child does, through the senses, but with all things deprived of the special magic of their names in my own tongue?

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker)
Page Number: 22
Explanation and Analysis:

I stood silent in the center of the plain and [the horsemen] began to wheel in great circles about me, uttering cries—not of malice I thought, but of mourning. Let us into your world, they seemed to be saying. Let us cross into your empire. Let us into your lives. Believe in us. Believe.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker)
Related Symbols: The Gods, The River Ister
Page Number: 24
Explanation and Analysis:
Chapter 2 Quotes

My life has been so frivolous. Brought up to believe in my own nerves, in restlessness, variety, change; educated entirely out of books, living always in a state of soft security, able to pamper myself, to drift about in a cloud of tender feelings, and with comfortable notions of my own intelligence, sociability, kindness, good breeding; moved by nothing I couldn’t give a name to, believing in nothing I couldn’t see.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), Ryzak / The Headman / The Old Man
Related Symbols: The Gods
Page Number: 40
Explanation and Analysis:

As a Roman citizen of the knightly order, the descendant of a whole line of warriors, with the law and the flower of Roman civilization to protect against barbarians, I scoffed at such old-fashioned notions as duty, patriotism, the military virtues. And here I was, aged fifty, standing on guard at the very edge of the known world.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker)
Page Number: 55
Explanation and Analysis:

I lie in the dark of the forest waiting for the moon. And softly, nearby, there are footsteps. A deer. The animal’s face leads toward me. I am filled with tenderness for it. Its tongue touches the surface of me, lapping a little. It takes part of me into itself, but I do not feel at all diminished.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Page Number: 62
Explanation and Analysis:

I have stopped finding fault with creation and have learned to accept it. We have some power in us that knows its own ends. It is that that drives us on to what we must finally become. We have only to conceive of the possibility and somehow the spirit works in us to make it actual. This is the true meaning of transformation.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker)
Page Number: 64
Explanation and Analysis:
Chapter 3 Quotes

All that will tie him to us, a new life, is invisibly there, he must feel it: the web of feeling that is this room, the strings—curiosity, a need to find out the usefulness to him of all these objects that surround him, and the way they define and illuminate the uses of his own body—these are the threads that hold him now, and along which his mind must travel to discover how he is connected to us.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Page Number: 82
Explanation and Analysis:

I too know all the boundary stones of our land, but to me they mean something different. They are where the world begins. Beyond them lies Rome and all the known world that we Romans have power over. Out there, beyond the boundary stones, the mystery begins.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), Ovid’s Brother
Page Number: 87
Explanation and Analysis:

Slowly I begin the final metamorphosis. I must drive out my old self and let the universe in. The creatures will come creeping back—not as gods transmogrified, but as themselves. Beaked, furred, fanged, tusked, clawed, hooved, snouted, they will settle in us, re-entering their old lives deep in our consciousness. And after them, the plants, also themselves.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Related Symbols: The True Language, The Gods, The River Ister
Page Number: 96
Explanation and Analysis:

All these weeks I have been following my own plan for the Child, and have never for one moment thought of him as anything but a creature of my own will, a figure in my dream. Now, as he kneels in the snow, howling, tearing his face with his nails, I have a vision of his utter separateness that terrifies me. I have no notion of what pain he is suffering, what deep sense of loss and deprivation his cries articulate.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Page Number: 106
Explanation and Analysis:
Chapter 4 Quotes

If I thought we might find [the Child] in the spring, I would let him go. But that is impossible. Having brought him in among us there is no way back. Already, in the warmth of the room, he is losing his capacity to withstand cold. […] Out there he would freeze. Whatever his secret was, I have taken it from him.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Page Number: 114
Explanation and Analysis:

What else should life be but a continual series of beginnings, of painful setting out into the unknown, pushing off from the edges of consciousness into the mystery of what we have not yet become […] What else is death but the refusal any longer to grow and suffer change?

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Related Symbols: The Gods, The River Ister
Page Number: 135-136
Explanation and Analysis:
Chapter 5 Quotes

The days pass, and I cease to count them. The river is far behind us. […] I no longer ask myself what we are making for. The notion of a destination no longer seems necessary to me. It has been swallowed up in the immensity of this landscape, as the days have been swallowed up by the sense I now have of a life that stretches beyond measurable time.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker), The Child
Related Symbols: The True Language, The River Ister
Page Number: 144
Explanation and Analysis:

From here I ascend, or lower myself, grain by grain, into the hands of the gods.

Related Characters: Ovid (speaker)
Related Symbols: The True Language, The Gods
Page Number: 150
Explanation and Analysis: